So with all this nonsense and bad foot stuff going on...things got pretty blue around here. Last night the girl's were playing out front, while I relaxed and watched.
Mae wanders over and says..."Momma, let's go for bike ride!"
"Mae...Momma cannot ride...remember...bad foot!"
"Well, lets go for a walk, Momma.."
"Mae..Momma has to stay off her foot."
"Well, I'll push you...we will use the wheelchair, Momma."
HEAVY, HEAVY SIGH (wheelchair is buried in the garage...hasn't been used in ages) Jeff stands to the side, shaking his head, knowing he will be rearranging the garage shortly.
"C'mon Momma...we can go in the wheelchair..remember Disneyworld..when we walked in the wheelchair and I rode in your lap?"
"Yes, Mae, that was fun."
"and I met Belle, and we saw that parade...and it was pretty chilly that day...remember?"
Mac chimes in..."Yes, I did that, too, when I was little. I remember watching the fireworks and eating raisins while sitting on your lap.."
"Yes, Mac, those fireworks were amazing!"
Mae, "Yes, and we walked around the zoo while I sat on your lap,"
Tears in my eyes..."Yes, wasn't that a nice day, saying hello to the giraffes?"
Mac.."We went to the zoo, too, remember...with Jessa, down in the city...so cool Momma. I sat with you, and the leaves were changing.."
"Yes, you were so little back then,"
"and we went to the museum, and saw the Egyptian village,"
Mae.."Oh those people we so creepy...I was scared, and held onto you, Momma..."
"Yes, Mae, you did not like the mummies all that much,"
"Yes, Momma, I love sitting on your lap and going for a ride. I'll go get the chair, and we will go for a walk."
Mae starts digging out the wheelchair. Jeff gives in, and cleans the chair off..it is covered in dust.
"Here, Momma, we will clean it up and go for our walk, OK? Kenzie can push Li-Li and Jr., and I can sit with you while Poppa pushes, and we can have our talk, OK?"
"Yes Momma, I need to talk to you. We need to have a talk. I like to talk to you while we walk. It has been too long since we have walked and talked."
I catch my breath. This is so true. We had been going for walks everyday, before the foot issues occurred. That was over 6 weeks ago. We haven't managed much walking since then.
They clean up the chair, and I lower myself in. It has been a while, and I do not normally troll the neighborhood in my chair. I feel a bit embarrassed.
Jeff is tired. But he gets everyone situated, and Mac starts pushing the stroller down the walk.
Mae climbs in my lap."I love sitting with you in the wheelchair. Now we can talk, Momma."
Off we go. The sky is that pinking blue-violet color it turns in the evening as the sun starts drooping in the sky. The cicadas are humming, otherwise things are quiet. We nod and wave at the neighbors. We gaze at the colors of the flowers and leaves. We marvel at how beautiful the evening sky is.
Mae starts chatting with me about school. She is going to co-op for the first time. As she chats, it becomes obvious she is very nervous about going. Fears abound, not knowing any friends, teachers, where she sits, how she finds the bathroom, where she eats lunch, not having Mac in her class...all these things come pouring out of her heart...while rubbing my arm and snuggling in close...as we roll about the neighborhood... in my chair.
I stroke her hair, and listen quietly as she rambles away. I reassure her as best I can, and then ask if she would like me to stay with her for a bit the first day...just until she feels better about things. Yes, she admits, that would help her feel better.
She brightens up, and start reminiscing again about all the different times we have walked around in the wheelchair.
"Momma, I miss walking with you. Can we do this again?"
Oh yes, Mae. Let's go for a walk again, very, very soon.